Mind Over Matter

Thursday, February 22, 2018
It lasted for quite years, since the last time my heart got screwed up.

The storm, that someone had caused me.

I was out of control. I was in denial. I was not letting myself to stick with the truth; that I am no longer someones favorite.

Until You came.

You proved me that He changed it for the better.

You; Once, a stranger.

You; Unreachable.

You; Perfection.

You; Oxygen to my lung.

You; Hope.

You; Happiness.

You; Company.

You; Love.

You; Life.

31st of May 2016

Was ultimately the best day I have ever had.

Terlalu bahagia.
Makanan yang biasa-biasa, jadi terlalu sedap.
Kerusi Subway yang keras, tiba-tiba jadi lembut.
Air yang tawar tiba-tiba jadi manis.

I let you fill in my soul.

I hold you so close, in adjacent of my heart,
and my ribs hurt from the pressure.

22nd of February 2018.

I created the poison to my heart.
I can barely accept that You are not You anymore.

you; a Lie.

you; a False Hope.

you; an Ego.

you; no longer a You.

you; the second one who has caused me the Storm.

you; eating me alive.

Our SR-Shinjuku date,
Our IKEA date,
Our lunch date,

is not going to happen.

The promises, are no longer promises.

I'm a liability, I'm a little much for you. So, we can't make our dreams true.

I do not know, what makes me cry for too much in every second.
I do not know, how much did I waste my tears for.
I do not know, why did all of these hurt me so bad.

And I do not know, for how long will I be in this Storm of my heart.

Sayang... kenapa...

Sampai bila..

Saya tak kuat.

Why can't you be You..

You don't love me anymore, don't you?